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And I wonder… where do I go from here?

Time has not moved at all.

It’s not as if what is happening right now is bound to change the way things are. Why do I care so much, why, and possibly, always about the wrong people, to those who hardly need me back?

What was it again, that quote which T.H. White said?

Perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically to those who hardly think about us in return.

Dreams seem to be more real than ever when I’m not supposed to be having them, when there’s no way in hell that they can happen in the real, waking world.

In my dreams, she never left.

How do I wake up, how do I make myself understand and grasp the possibility, the reality, even, that her presence in my dreams does not mean that I am still in hers, too, if I was even there, to begin with?

Where do I go, where should I go when even my dreams have been tarnished? It isn’t just this dream; all the others have been rusting, too.

I want to sleep but I know that I have to fight it. There has to be some other way out.

There must be.